


Touched by Clarity

by starlightoffandoms (destinyofdreams)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bisexual Dean, Fallen Castiel, First Kiss, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, Love Confessions, M/M, Sad and Happy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-06
Updated: 2014-11-06
Packaged: 2018-02-24 07:04:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,379
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2572514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/destinyofdreams/pseuds/starlightoffandoms
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel is ready to tell Dean of his feelings.  Things did not go quite as planned the first time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Touched by Clarity

[The photo set](http://doomsdayy.tumblr.com/post/79885231452/castiel-is-finally-ready-to-tell-dean-about-his)

 

* * *

 

Castiel sat behind the steering wheel of his car as he stared at the house he shared with Dean.  Sam had moved out two years prior and it had been only Castiel and Dean since.  They had retired from active hunting and had settled down in a house a town away from the bunker.  Dean had wanted to live above ground in a place that was not too far from the bunker and had windows.  They had made it a home.

Castiel had taken the years to get accustom to his humanity.  With his humanity had come the awareness his emotions.  The sharp physically affective emotions that he had not expected to be challenging.  The range was more of a kaleidoscope than what angels had understood.  Castiel had come to terms with his love for Dean.  It had taken him another year to own the feelings.  Castiel swallowed hard and tried to slow the frantic heart palpitations as he continued to stare at the house.

“You lead a garrison in wars.  You have gone on missions from god.  This is nothing as dangerous or life threatening.  Unless,” Castiel swallowed, “he punches me.”

Castiel sighed and closed his eyes.  He sent a silent prayer to his long absent father.  Castiel pocketed his keys and grabbed the single rose he had debated over from the passenger seat.  Castiel made is way slowly to the house and entered through the kitchen door.  Dean was nowhere in sight.

“Dean?” his voice wavered a bit, “Dean,” he called a little louder and steady.

“Coming,” Dean called from upstairs.

Castiel leaned against the counter and took a deep breath.  Dean jogged down the back stairs into the kitchen.  Castiel stood quickly and placed his hand with the rose behind his back.  He smiled over at Dean as he entered the room.  Dean dropped his boots on the floor and took a seat to put them on. 

“You look nice,” Castiel cleared his throat as he took in Dean’s well groomed appearance.

“Thanks,” Dean tied his shoes.

“Dean, I need to tell you something,” Castiel took a shaky step forward from the center island.

“Not now okay?  I have a date,” Dean grinned, wiggled his eyebrows and stood as he grabbed his coat from the back of the chair.

“Oh,” Castiel’s lips twitched in an almost smile.

“Later Cas,” Dean was out the door.

Castiel stared at the door.  He waited to hear the rumble of the impala but it never came.  Castiel closed his eyes and let out a shaky breath.  He dropped his arm to his side and slowly opened his eyes.  He looked around the sunny kitchen with its cheerful yellows, greens and blues that seemed to mock him.  Castiel placed the rose on the counter and went outside.  As he suspected, the impala was still in the driveway. 

 

Castiel fielded a few calls from people that checked up on other hunters as he had grown accustom throughout the day.  In between calls he kept himself busy with chores and mindless television.  Castiel tried not to watch the clock but as the hour grew late his anxiety returned. 

Castiel sat on the front porch for an hour and there was still no sign of Dean and his date.  He called it a night and went inside.  He was in bed with a book when heard the car pull in the driveway.  Castiel went to his window and looked down. 

Dean’s laugh carried through the window that Castiel had left slightly cracked for the breeze.  Castiel eased the window a little higher as he watched through the blinds. 

The man opened the door and Dean got out of the car.  Dean continued to laugh at the joke the man had told as they had pulled in the driveway.  Dean leaned against the passenger side of the car and the man stood closer.  Dean glanced over the man’s shoulder at the movement in the window.  He didn’t let his gaze linger.

“I had a real nice time Josh,” Dean smiled up at him.

“So did I Dean,” Josh brushed his thumb along Dean’s jaw, “it doesn’t have to end now.”

“Yeah it does,” Dean nodded.

“When Gabby set us up she gave me a little advice,” Josh leaned in and kissed Dean’s neck.

“Mm I bet she did,” Dean moved his hands to Josh’s chest, “I have to remember to never trust an exe to set me up.  They give all of my secrets out. Damn,” he tilted his head as his eyes fluttered.

“Yeah,” Josh nipped his pulse point and pressed closer.

“Naw,” Dean blinked a few times and pushed against Josh, “not on the first date.”

“You sure?” Josh took a step back, “I can make it worth it.”

“But would you respect me if I did?” Dean raised an eyebrow.

“You are something else Dean.  You are charming, charismatic, and a big flirt.  If I wasn’t interested in more with you I may push the issue.  I like you though and I don’t want to mess this up.”

“Good.”

“Can I have a good night kiss?” Josh leaned in.

“You got more already than I give usually,” Dean placed his finger on Josh’s lips.

“Gabby lied about you.  She said you were a hit it and quit it type of guy.  I knew she was mistaken.  You wouldn’t have waited this long to meet if all you wanted was sex,” Josh grabbed Dean’s hand and kissed it.

“People change.  I’ll call you to set up the next date,” Dean moved around Josh.

“I’ll be waiting.”

Castiel watched Josh get in the car as Dean disappeared from his line of sight.  Castiel rushed back to his bed and grabbed his book.  He stared at the page as he listened to the steady clomp of Dean’s boots on the stairs.  Dean tapped on the door then let himself in.

“Hey ya Cas.”

“Oh,” Castiel marked his place and put his book down, “you're home.”

“You knew that I was home.  I saw you in the window.”

“Oh,” Castiel looked down at his hands he cupped in his lap.

“Is everything good Cas?” Dean sat on the foot of his bed.

“Of course Dean.  Everything,” Castiel sighed, “is well.”

“What’s with the rose that looked like it met a shredder?”

With a jerk of his head Castiel met Dean’s eyes, “what?”

“There were a couple petals on the floor so I picked them up and when I opened the trash it was in there,” Dean looked at him expectantly.

“I,” Castiel eyes flitted around the room, “I tore it up.”

“Obviously.”

“That is all,” Castiel pressed his lips in a fine line.

“Where’d the rose come from?  Why did you tear it up?” Dean watched him patiently.

“I would rather not discuss this.  You smell of someone else,” Castiel blurted.

“His name is Josh.  His aftershave does have a strong scent.  I’ll go shower,” Dean stood and a look Castiel didn’t understand passed over him, “this conversation isn’t over.”

“I am tired.  I will see you in the morning.”

“Alright Cas.”

Dean pulled the door close as he left.  Castiel took a deep breath and shook his head.  He shut his light off to make sure Dean didn’t return after his shower.

<<<>>> 

Castiel made a large breakfast and made sure the trash was taken out before Dean woke.  Dean showed as Castiel poured the coffee into two mugs and carried them to the table.  Dean was still in his sleep clothes as they sat down at the table.

“This looks great.  It doesn’t mean you’re off the hook about the rose thing.”

“Hm.”

“I mean it Cas.  Something is going on with you.  What did you want to talk about?  I know I ran outta here yesterday kinda quick.  It seemed important,” Dean sipped his coffee.

“Are you seeing Josh again?” Castiel asked as he stared at his plate while he cut his pancakes.

“Possibly.  I had fun last night.”

“Then what I have to say in unimportant.”

Castiel felt Dean’s eyes on him while he ate but he could not bring up the courage to meet his eyes.

“Cas, please don’t close me out.”

“Dean.”

“That spoke a lot more than you have.  My name felt heavy there,” Dean replied softly as he urged Castiel to speak.

“I was a soldier.  I was a warrior of god.  I was more than anything that I can sum up in words that you would comprehend.  This conversation has me more frightened than anything I have ever faced before,” Castiel placed his fork down and chanced a look at Dean.

“Then take your time.  It seems very important to you.  And if it’s important to you then it is important to me,” Dean gave him an encouraging smile.

“Yes,” Castiel’s lips turned up slightly.

“Build up to it if you have to.”

“We have known each other for nine almost ten years.  We have been literally through heaven and hell together.”

“Yes.”

“We have done things to each other that we can never forget but we have accepted and moved on.  We have lived these last two years as roommates.  It has been just the two of us no one else.  With only part of my grace returned I am more human now than angel.  I rely solely on my humanity to live each day.  I have decided that I am ready to have the final thing that is missing from my human life,” Castiel stalls and takes a sip of his coffee.

“And what is that Cas?”

“I want a relationship.  A romantic relationship.”

“Oh,” Dean’s smile falls, “I see.”

“I do not think that you do,” Castiel peered into Dean’s hazel green eyes and scrounged up all the courage he could.

“No I get it.  You want me to help you find someone.”

“Not at all,” Castiel shook his head and scooted his chair back.

“Then why are we having this conversation?” Dean watched as Castiel walked around the table and stood next to him.

“I do not need help Dean.  I already have someone in mind,” Castiel didn’t blink as he stopped by Dean’s side.

“Oh?”

“Yes,” Castiel whispered and knelt down.

Dean watched as Castiel’s hand moved to his face.  Dean’s eyes widened.

“I want to be in a romantic relationship with you.  Dean, I want to be more than just a roommate.”

“Okay,” Dean murmured and swallowed hard, “I can do that.  Yeah,” he grinned, “I think it would be awesome.”

“Good,” Castiel looked at Dean’s lips as he moved in.

“Yeah.  Good,” Dean brushed his lips against Castiel’s.

The kiss was light and a simple promise for the future.

“Awesome,” Dean smiled against Castiel’s lips.

“Yes.”

Castiel stood and returned back to his breakfast.  Dean pulled out his phone and tapped out two text messages then put the phone down.

“What did you just do?”

“I let Josh know that I was no longer interested.  I also sent Sam a message that he would need to announce himself before he came to visit since this isn’t just a house with friends anymore,” Dean winked as he picked his fork up.

“Why would Sam need to—OH! In case we are in the middle of having sex.  I see.  Yes it is a good thing for him to give notice before he arrives just in case we do not make it to a bedroom,” Castiel nodded.

“You are interested in sex with me then?” Dean shot him a hopefully expression.

“Oh very much.  Once we have established our relationship I expect there to be lots of it.  I have been researching and buying items to aid in the intercourse should we choose to experiment.”

Dean coughed as the bite he had tried to swallow got lodged in his throat.  It took him a moment to clear it.  He took a gulp of orange juice and cleared his throat.

“Items?  Experiment?”

“Yes.  There were several martial aids that I was intrigued by.  I think that you will like them too.  Especially the vibrating butt plug,” Castiel smiled.

“Alright that is enough talk about marital aids.”

“Sorry.  I forget that you are not accustom to openness when it comes to bedroom acts.  Forgive me.”

“You are serious about wanting a relationship with me?” Dean smiled nervously.

“Yes of course Dean.”

“Great,” Dean picked up his phone and sent a text back to his brother, “Sam says it’s about time,” he chuckled and put his phone down.

“Sam is very observant.”

“Oh Cas,” Dean shot him an apologetic look.

“What?”

“The rose.  Yesterday.  That,” Dean watched him closely, “that was for me.  That’s what you wanted to talk about.”

“Yes,” Castiel blushed and finished his breakfast.

“I’m so sorry.  Then you saw me with Josh.  No wonder this was hard for you.  I have had feelings for you for awhile Cas.  I just didn’t think I’d ever have the chance to get somewhere with you.  That’s why I set the date up.  I had been single for so long and I couldn’t bring myself to make the first move.  I’m glad we’re here now.”

“As am I.  If you have nothing planned for this evening I would like to take you on a date myself,” Castiel stood and took his plate and mug to the sink.

“I have to go in to the hardware store and put in a few hours but I get off at four.  I can get back here and we can go out.”

“That sounds wonderful.  I have to do inventory of the new arrivals at the library so that will be perfect.”

“Awesome.”

Dean finished breakfast while Castiel cleaned the kitchen.  He went and got ready for his day then caught up with Castiel in his room.

“I’ll see you later sweetheart,” Dean kissed his cheek.

“See you later.”

Castiel touched his cheek as he listened to Dean head out for the day.  He smiled and finished getting dressed.  He had done what he had set out to do and it had turned out a lot better than he had expected.  Castiel was proud of himself and could not wait the official start their relationship at dinner.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for reading! Thanks Meg, doomsdayy, so much for making and letting me use the photo set. I needed a happier ending that what I imagined. I hope everyone has a fantastic day! I also randomly decided to make 4 dozen cookies so cookies for everyone! *throws cookies into the crowd*


End file.
